We planned to elope in one month in Punta Cana - Part 4 - Finding the Dress

If you’d have told me, at any point in my 20s, that I’d be married before I was 30, I’d have laughed in stubborn and sour disbelief. In the ‘olden days’ when my parents were my age, if a woman wasn’t married or have plans to marry by the time she was 30, other women would assume there’s ‘something wrong with her’. To be quite honest, I was leaning more towards accepting a life as a lonely spinster, until I met my other half, Brendan.

After only a year of dating Brendan, because of all we’ve been through, I knew he was ‘the one’. The idea of marriage had been brought up as a possibility, however, because of complicated situations, I assumed it would come with many challenges and a lot of stress. Planning a ‘big wedding’ was something I had no interest in, and neither did Brendan.

Seven months ago, on March 11th 2020, I married the person I love, have been through the most with, and am confident is my other half. On the Arena Gorda Beach at the RIU Republica in Punta Cana, Brendan and I had a beautiful ceremony, and spent the entire day, just the two of us. With only one month to plan, we decided to elope on our trip which we booked on February 8th, 2020.

Our ceremony wasn’t quite like this – No guests, no chairs, and no added expenses.

A simple and beautiful archway, just for the two of us.

This is Part 4 of what I plan to be a series of blogs describing the different parts of the planning, lead up to, ceremony and celebrations, and returning home to a world which COVID-19 changed forever. You can read the first post here . This post is about ‘Finding the Dress’.

Wedding Wire, one of the most popular sources for Brides-to-Be seeking advice planning their special day, recommends shopping for your wedding dress 12-14 months before your wedding, or shortly after you’re engaged. They also recommend setting a budget and selecting ‘your entourage’ for your wedding dress shopping.

I began looking at wedding dresses just after we received confirmation of our wedding date in Punta Cana; all of about 3 weeks before our departure date. Since we were keeping our wedding for the most part a secret, I didn’t have an ‘entourage’ to go wedding dress shopping with. As for a budget, well, let’s just say it would be significantly less than the average Canadian bride’s.

According to a poll done by CBC in 2019, the average cost of a wedding dress in Canada is $1500.00. This cost is more than what Brendan and I’s wedding cost all-in-all.

Although I’d never been one of those girls to fantasize about their wedding day, I did know if I got married, I’d want it to be at a beach, and I had a very specific type of dress in mind: I envisioned myself in a short ‘little white dress’ jazzed up with a veil and blingy accessories.

This is pretty close, but maybe a little less ‘night out in Vegas’

Online, I wasn’t finding quite the dress I pictured, and the search was getting frustrating. Many brides spend countless hours enjoying this tedious browsing, where as I’d had enough after two hours. So I made an appointment at David’s Bridal in Hamilton, where my experience was to sum it up, lonely and disappointing.

Since I was alone and without a bridal party, I was shown a few dresses, none of which were my style. Some how I ended up walking out with a Grade 8 Prom Dress which was short, with a train, and needed padded insert alterations. Of course, getting the alterations done on such short notice would be a ‘huge favour’, given my unorthodox way of last minuet wedding dress shopping.

Here are some fun facts about what Wedding Wire recommends for the typical Bride regarding her ‘Wedding Dress Timeline’, prior to her wedding day:

12-14 months before your wedding: Start this production of a process to to find ‘the one’ (shouldn’t finding ‘the one’ refer to the person you are marrying and not the dress you are wearing on your wedding day?)
9 months before your wedding: Purchase the gown- just the ‘down payment’- I’m guessing this initial amount is more than what my final dress cost. Ladies, it can take more than 6 months to have your dress custom made and shipped to your salon.
6 months before your wedding: Choose your shoes, accessories, and of course your ‘under garments’
3 months before your wedding: Schedule your first of 3 fittings. Apparently, you will need it to be tailored to make sure it ‘fits like a glove’, and all these costly alterations can take months
6 weeks before your wedding: Your second fitting
3 weeks before your wedding: Your final fitting, where your dress should be just about perfect after all this, while allowing your seamstress time to make ‘small alterations’

Absolutely nothing about that timeline sounds appealing to me at all…Anyways, back to my disappointment at David’s Bridal.

I felt like I’d not been taken seriously. I was rushed through the process. I wasn’t even given David Bridal’s signature sign to take a photo with the saying “I found the one”. A customer at my work saw a selfie I took in this dress and said “You don’t look happy.” She was right. How could I enjoy something special on my own?

Brendan and I had been the only ones planning our wedding (on such short notice), so I knew I needed him to be present when I found my perfect wedding dress. If you really are your husband’s best friend, shouldn’t he be there during every stage of the most important day of your life?

On Saturday February 22nd, less than two weeks before our departure date to Punta Cana, Brendan and I went to Toronto’s Eaton Centre looking for my perfect dress. We went to a few stores looking for a ‘sexy short white dress’, but then came across M Boutique, which surprisingly had about five options for me to try.

I knew I’d found ‘the one’ when Brendan’s eyes light up- a short white dress with spaghetti straps and jewel tassels. It looked good on me, and was so “me”, and I could tell he genuinely loved the match. My best friend Jessica later said to me, after our wedding when she saw the photos, “Where did you get that dress? It’s so you… It’s like you had that dress waiting your whole life.”

Now that I had my perfect dress, I could return the one I’d bought out of pressure from David’s Bridal. Upon returning the dress, I took a look around and actually found a pair of gorgeous sparkly wedges which matched my outfit.

I was also set on the idea of a wedding veil (got to keep something about my Bride outfit traditional). Chapel or Cathedral veils which fall to the floor were not only far too long, but cost between $100-$200. Fortunately, there was a ‘Flower Girl’ veil which fell just below my shoulders, and cost half the price.

My final outfit choices which I wore on my wedding day included:

My dress from M Boutique
Sparkly wedges from David’s Bridal
‘Flower Girl’ veil from David’s Bridal
White flower for my hair from Ardene
Silver earrings from Ardene
Silver chain belt from Ardene
Silver clutch from Ardene

Brendan went shopping separately for his new white dress shirt, brown dress shorts, and leather flip flops.

Together, we looked exactly how we should have on our wedding day. Add in the backdrop of a beautiful beach with crashing waves, and we had the perfect photos.

This one was our only pre-planned shot- ‘Kissing the War Goodbye’ Sailor & Nurse Victory Day Kiss.

A tribute to Brendan’s Grandfather and my Grandfather and Grandmother, who fought in World War II but did not live to see us be married.

Coming soon, will be a series of sub-blogs which go into detail of the planning, ceremony, and reception:

Upon arrival
The proposal & rings
Our wedding day
The ceremony
The reception dinner
After the wedding
Honeymoon on quarantine

To wrap it up in as few words as possible, our wedding day went PERFECT. Despite having rain on-and-off throughout the week, our special day, Wednesday March 11th, was sunny with a few clouds, and no rain. We spent the entire day together, a beautiful wedding at 4pm on the beach, and had a reception dinner with a delicious cake.

Yessica was an amazing planner and ensured we had our dream wedding. We were the only two guests at our wedding, and we wouldn’t have done it any other way.